The Body of Christ
The Lord has been nudging me to start writing again. It has been a long time. These days, my hours are filled with homeschooling, working full-time in the Immigration and Refugee Ministry and as an administrative assistant for the Christifideles program of the Archdiocese of Seattle, and studying for a masters in theology through the Christifideles program and St. Martin's University. But I do miss writing more informally.
I am currently going through a hard thing. In September, I was diagnosed with stage one breast cancer and this week I will be having a double mastectomy. The rest of my treatment plan will be determined in a few weeks from test results from the surgery.
This fall I have watched the breathtaking autumn leaves, which only months ago flowered and bore fruit, change color and fall away, knowing that part of my body, which only months ago nursed our almost two-year-old daughter, is changing and will be cut away.
Seasons change.
For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven;
A time to be born, and a time to die;
A time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted;
A time to kill, and a time to heal;
A time to break down, and a time to build up;
A time to weep, and a time to laugh;
A time to mourn, and a time to dance . . .
This season is no fun. There have been many very emotional days with a lot of tears and much ugly crying. There have been grumpy, stressful days when I have lost my temper. There have been anxious nights when I cannot sleep. All of that is true.
But something else is true and proclaims the unchanging and eternal truth more clearly.
On this first Sunday of Advent, there are fresh flowers on our kitchen table, our prayer table, the table at the top of our stairs, the end table in our living room, my bathroom, and the nightstand next to our bed.
This afternoon, I was supposed to host a Friendsgiving. I invited about twenty-five women to come to our home so that I could be surrounded by some of the faithful women who have loved, supported, and encouraged me these past months. However, yesterday I came down with a stomach bug that made it clear I could not host a gathering today. Disappointed, I let these women know I would not actually be able to host Friendsgiving. Thankfully, I am improving greatly today and am recovering quickly.
Though I could not spend the afternoon with friends, many have texted, dropped off food, flowers, and sent kind and encouraging notes and prayers, and now the rooms of our home and shelves of our refrigerator are showered with love. 💕
While this season is hard, it's just a bump in the road. And God loves to use times like these to transform, teach, strengthen, love, and invite us closer to Him.
When I came home with this diagnosis, I had many people to share with, and became very aware that there are many who have no one to share a diagnosis with and who would go through treatment alone.
While this season is hard, God has been showing me in very concrete ways the beautiful community of family and friends that He has blessed us with. Truly, what more could we want?
I am currently taking a Liturgy and Sacraments class. This week, I will be giving a presentation on the Liturgy of the Eucharist. Preparing for this presentation has truly been such a gift, because it has reminded me and deepened my understanding of some of my most favorite parts of the Mass and of our faith. One of the elements I have been studying is the Body of Christ.
We believe that the Body of Christ is present in the Eucharist but also that the Body of Christ is present within all baptized Christians. We receive Jesus in the bread and wine so that we can go out and be the face of Jesus to those around us in our everyday lives.
I couldn't receive Jesus at Mass today, but Jesus has been showing me His face in the Body of Christ around me.
Each flower is a reminder.
When I was diagnosed, Jason and I decided it would be a good time to freshen up our bedroom so that I can have a restful place to rest and recover from surgery. The weeks went on full of appointments, work, and school, and still we had not painted a single wall with the newly purchased cans of paint. A close friend heard and then spent her Saturday afternoon painting the first coat. She also took contributions from friends to purchase some framed prints from one of my favorite Catholic artists, Jose Luis Castillo, to hang in our bedroom so that I can be in the presence of beauty while I heal, for she believes as I do, that
beauty is healing.
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| Nativity by Castrillo |
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| The Holy Supper by Castrillo |
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| Illumination of the Sacred Hearts by Castrillo |
This is the Body of Christ as real as
the Body of Christ we receive every Sunday at Mass.
This is God loving me through the people around me and these are just a couple of beautiful examples from this day. I cannot share all of the ways Jason, my mom, and other family members and friends have loved me during this season; so many dinners, so many cups of coffee and tea, so many tears shed, so many diapers changed, so many hugs, so many words of encouragement, so many prayers.
This first Sunday of Advent, I am filled with hope and gratitude, for while this season will be a challenge, God will continue to strengthen and love me through the people and circumstances of each day.
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